Living with chronic illness teaches you to slow down and appreciate the simple, mundane aspects of life that were once overlooked. The freedom and ability to wake up pain-free, enjoy a peaceful morning, clean, or shower without pain and discomfort are all tasks that can easily be taken for granted.
Before illness, life often moves quickly, with a tendency to race from one task to another. Small moments—like savoring a cup of coffee, taking a short walk outside, or enjoying a meal—become background noise. Chronic illness changes that. When you're forced to slow down due to the physical or mental limitations of your condition, these little moments become the main event.
During the first few months of 2024, I was bedridden nearly 80% of the time. I had just come off a year of cycling the most miles I’d ever logged, and it was difficult to suddenly quit the activities I loved. While I haven’t been able to ride my bike again, I aim for two walks a day as my daily activity, and I’m grateful for that. There are many people who can’t walk, and these walks have become the highlight of my day. I try to see them as a gift.
A few years ago, I was listening to a podcast on a long trip when the host said something along the lines of, "Health is all we’ve got; without it, we are nothing." That quote stuck with me. After my health worsened in 2024, I’ve come to realize that health is the foundation upon which everything is built.
All those things that once seemed so important such as career achievements, social events, and travel, have taken a back seat to something more important: my well-being. Without health, nothing else matters, a realization that has led me to completely reevaluate how I live my life.
Before chronic illness, it's easy to neglect your mind and body, whether through a poor diet, lack of activity, mental health neglect, or inadequate sleep. But illness can strike at any moment, and when it does, that’s when many people realize how essential these things are. Self-care stops being an afterthought and becomes a necessity. You learn to listen to your body and respect its limits and needs.
I wish it hadn’t taken a chronic illness for me to become aware of what I’m putting into my body or to prioritize self-care. However, it’s never too late to change and start focusing on balance and health. Maybe you turn down social invites because you need rest, or perhaps you reduce your work hours to avoid burnout and stress. This can be difficult in a culture that equates being busy with success, but chronic illness gives you the clarity to realize that without health, you won’t enjoy those activities anyway.
Experiencing the struggles, frustrations, and limitations that illness imposes has given me a heightened sense of empathy for others. My grandparents, for example, often start conversations by discussing their pain or with a generally negative outlook. I used to roll my eyes and wonder why they were always so negative. Now I understand. Chronic pain can be lonely. There is no break, and sometimes, you just need someone or something to vent to.
"We have one shot at life."
After becoming disabled in 2024, the thought, “Why me?” plagued me early in the year. I was filled with self-pity, constantly feeling sorry for myself. It truly felt like my life was over, and I began grieving my former self. It felt unfair to have only one life to live and to spend it fighting my own body. Would it be indefinite? Was there any hope for normalcy? While I still struggle with these thoughts at times, I’ve shifted toward a greater empathy for others dealing with hardships.
Life can be unfair. Whether it’s chronic illness, terminal illness, or any kind of disability, much of it is beyond our control. I wish everyone had a fair shot at living a healthy life. It’s not fair that children get cancer or that people develop spontaneous illnesses or disabilities that are beyond their control.
After spending so much time battling my own body and mind, I’ve become more patient and understanding when others face their own challenges. I’ve stopped measuring people by their productivity or what they can “do” and instead value them for who they are. This shift in perspective has led to a more compassionate, kinder outlook on life.
It took me seven years to get through college, and though I don’t remember much from the classes I attended, one phrase stuck with me and can be applied to all aspects of life. When a tough situation arises, ask yourself: Is this a big problem or a small problem? If it’s a small problem, can it wait, and is it worth getting worked up over? If it’s a big problem, what can be done to fix it?
Chronic illness has a way of stripping life down to its essentials. When you're constantly managing symptoms and trying to stay functional, things that once bothered you, like petty conflicts or holding grudges, start to seem insignificant. Life is too short to waste on small problems, because in the grand scheme, they don’t matter.
Take driving, for example. Driving can bring out the worst in people. Say you get cut off in traffic, which happens daily for most. How do you react? Do you immediately feel angry and start tailgating the other driver? If you react with anger and stress, stop and ask yourself, “Is my reaction productive, and does it provide any value to my life right now?”
I try to see these situations as small problems not worth my energy. Getting angry won’t change the situation. You can’t control others, but you can control your response.
Focusing on What Truly Matters
The challenges of chronic illness have reminded me of what’s important in life: love, connection, peace, and well-being. Grudges and daily trivial concerns drain energy that could be better spent on healing, self-care, or enjoying good moments. Illness has also taught me to forgive more easily and focus on what really matters in the present.
Forgiveness doesn’t have to mean forgetting, but it does mean choosing not to carry unnecessary emotional burdens. It could be a falling-out with a friend, a conflict at work, or even guilt over something from the past. Are these things really worth the energy? With the demands of illness, I need every ounce of energy I can muster. Holding onto anger or resentment will only drain me further. Letting go opens up more space for inner peace.
Chronic illness forces you to reevaluate life’s priorities. It strips away distractions and reminds you that health, love, and peace are the foundations of a meaningful life. What once seemed urgent no longer holds as much weight. The freedom to enjoy life’s simple pleasures becomes the highlight. Along the way, you gain empathy, learn to forgive, and discover that life is too short to be wasted on things that don’t matter. Every moment becomes a gift, and in that realization, you find a new way to live, one that focuses on what truly matters.
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